Sometimes I make something that I deem worthy of sharing and sometimes I don’t. But sometimes I also just want to expand upon my practice beyond a quick instagram post.
Last Saturday I made my way to the Salton Sea area as I continue to make photographs for my long term project ‘Far away from the place where you are.’ It seems like I have been driving there once a week for 3-4 years now.
I have been, I know I am part of the problem.
It is a 3 hour drive from LA to the Sea so it is commitment of my time. My time?! Time sure has a hold on me. I spend too much of my time worrying about time. Tick tock!
It was and continues to be hot by the Salton Sea. It is a desert climate after all and the earth is just getting hotter and hotter. It was around 110 degrees this go round. My goal was to make some photographs in an area that is close to the sea (Ocotillo) but its generally hotter there and has very little shade so I decided to kill some time before the light was just right and drove around Salton City to see if I could find anything intriguing. It seems like every time I return, a new property has been abandoned or I discover some little hidden gem.
Before entering a stripped out double wide property I have one lime popsicle. It drips down my hand melting from the extreme heat.
Later, I find a home that appears empty and it has been left with the water running and it is flooding the street. I hop the fence and check to see if I can turn off the water but no luck. I end up calling the police to let them know but they already know. I ponder whether or not to make photographs inside the property but its sketchy and not particularly interesting inside. Although there is a sweet old Ford truck that is all smashed up in the driveway but its still beautiful.
Before I realize it, time is running out for that good light. I hop in my Crv, drive to my spot and it’s not fully what I was thinking for some reason. I had some different idea in my head of what I was gonna arrive at. So, the sun is setting and I just sort of grab my camera and book it towards what I believe could be something interesting. But nothing is really clicking creatively. I stumbled around for a bit. As I am packing up I may have made an image that I like but I haven’t developed it yet. Of the 7 shots I took, I developed 6 so far and they are all rather boring. You can see the indecision. I missed the moment. I didn’t grant myself the necessary time.
FUCK! Time has screwed me again! I guess I screwed myself. Despite listening to Rick Rubin’s book about creativity right before making photographs. I somehow still couldn’t be creative. But now I am filled with some excitement to improve upon what I achieved. Do better! Its a must. I guess knowing in the moment that you didn’t devote the energy necessary is hard to swallow. Just show up I guess. Be present. Be mindful. Be aware. That’s what I am telling myself for now at least.
